Monday, September 22, 2008

Vulnerable to the Passage of Time

It's hard to believe that almost a month has gone by since my last post. I have thought of several things to write about, but the one that stands out to me right now is the vulnerability that we all have to TIME. It's funny how the older we get, the faster time seems to go. I remember being a kid and thinking it was just FOREVER until Christmas (even once we were out on school break!). Now, it's late September, and it feels like Christmas was only a couple of months ago. As Moms, this "time flies" concept takes on a whole new meaning. It means that we are vulnerable to the realization (and all the emotion that comes with it) that our children are growing up WAYYYYYY too fast. It seems like only yesterday that......I can hardly bear to think that way. I guess that's one of the great blessings in having my children spaced 4 years apart-just when I "lose" one to preschool, I have a new baby to love at home.


Don't get me wrong-it's such a great thing to watch children grow. I am watching Hannah (my almost 6 month old) with the bittersweet joy that comes with the first year. A tiny helpless infant that, in 12 months time, develops into a walking, talking toddler. It is SO amazing-so fun to watch, and yet, seems to happen in the blink of an eye sometimes.

There are times I wish I wasn't so sentimental, because it really hurts a lot to be so exposed. I think, though, that it also allows me to experience things more deeply and fully. The great thing, I realize, is that with family to share life's experiences and pictures that document the journey, we can go back in time in our hearts and minds, continuing to learn through reflection accompanied by broadened perspective. We start to see the patterns and how God has placed us to interlock as pieces in a puzzle. We begin to glimpse the vision that He has for our tiny part in the world, and we acknowledge what He has always known and been trying to tell us from the Beginning-that God is God and we are NOT, that He actually does know what He's doing, and that He DOES indeed want what is best for us, even if we can't see it that way from our limited viewpoint.